50 Fun Things To Do While Your Still Human
by TeamEMasenCullen
Summary: Alice decides that Bella needs some excitment in her life so makes a list of things to do while she's still human. Who makes prank calls with her? Who get's arrested? Read and find out. xx P.S. Story is much better than summary. I think. Rated T.
1. Prologue

**New story! I really hope you like it. **

**Disclaimer - I sadly do not own the Twilight characters. All rights go to SM.**

**So I really hope you readers (If I have any out there) like this. I know it's really short. I just write for a few hours then I'm so excited to get it out so you guys can read it that after I post it I'm like, "That was such a short chapter."**

**So… let the reading begin!**

**Bella is still human. There is no Nessie.**

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Bella's POV

So… here I am, sitting on the couch at the Cullen's house. We are so bored. There is nothing to do and no where important to be.

Alice has asked me all day if we can do 'Bella Barbie'. As usual, I say no. Emmett cracked a few jokes here and there, but he stopped after Rosalie smacked him in the back of the head saying, "You idiot! Don't you know that everyone's not in the mood for jokes?" He shut up after that. I would have to thank Rosalie later; The jokes were always about me. I was happy for a break from his jokes. They weren't even funny.

Edward played his piano for a while. He got bored after perfecting one of his newly composed songs. Jasper was somewhere in the house, probably reading about the Civil Wars and muttering something about wrong facts in the book.

Alice's face lit up just then. I sighed. She was up to no good. "What, Alice?"

"I came up with the perfect stuff for us to do over the summer!" She said.

I wonder what it was. Truth or Dare… No it couldn't be. That game only lasts a few hours. Playing Truth or Dare with the Cullen's would probably be different though. I could only picture it now.

_Start of daydream -_

"Emmett, Truth or Dare?" Alice would ask him sweetly.

"Dare." He would state proudly.

"I dare you to jump of the Sear's Tower and play dead." She would say.

In the backround I would mutter, "More like Truth or Die…"

_End of daydream -_

Then maybe we could get kicked out of the mall… That wouldn't work out either. Getting kicked out of the mall only takes a few hours too.

Alice's sudden squealing brought me out of my thoughts.

"We could do…" She paused for a dramatic effect. "The fifty fun things to do while your still human! It would be for you, of course. I should start making that list now…" She walked away to go find some paper and a pen.

So I don't even get a say in this? Nothing? Well… I guess it could be fun. There is a lot of stuff that I would still like to do. Like… getting drunk! I know it doesn't sound like me, but I always wanted to know what it would be like.

I could maybe even go clubbing too. Now that would be fun. Alice could even have her fun for doing Bella Barbie for that too.

"Are you sure you want to do this." Edward murmured beside me.

"Well, you can't escape the wrath of the pixie." I said.

Alice had obviously heard us. You could hear her shouting to us down the hallway.

Edward sighed. "Fine, love."

By the end of the day, we had my whole list planned out. We would be starting it tomorrow. I would be making prank calls all day tomorrow with Alice and Rose. This would be fun.

Edward wasn't aware that on the list was, 'Getting Drunk'. We all knew Edward wouldn't like that, so we are going to do it when Edward is out hunting.

So, continuing my story, I really like this idea that Alice came up with. I'm pretty sure it was the first idea that ever seemed fun to me.

I'm just so excited for this. Some of them include the pack too. Like hot dog eating contests and stuff. That would be really fun.

I'm going to take dance lessons too. I can't believe I'm taking them, I'm so uncoordinated that it's not even funny anymore. I can only picture it.

Edward brought me back to my house later today. I made dinner for Charlie and we ate in silence, as usual.

After finishing dinner, I washed the dishes and cleaned the table. Charlie was watching sports. Probably baseball…

To pass the time until Edward came to my house - Which, Charlie did not know of. Edward's super vampire abilities allow him to climb up the side of my house without being seen or heard. - I decided to pick up my old battered copy of Wuthering Heights.

After an hour or so, I got tired so I went to the bathroom and got changed into my pajama's. Alice would have died -not literally - if she saw what I was wearing to bed. My old t-shirt and rolled up sweatpants were my pajama's. They are always so comfy, I can't help but loving them. Alice had tried several times to squeeze me into too tight Victoria's Secret pajama's but I always ended taking them off to breathe.

When I looked at the clock, it only read 10:00. I decided to get onto the computer and read some email's that Renee had sent me.

I had three new e-mail's from her. The first one had only asked how I was doing. The second one seemed slightly urgent. Phil was supposed to be home from a baseball game yesterday and he still hadn't come home. Renee sounded like she was going to explode from anxiousness any minute. She was so panicked. Phil still hadn't come home yet and he hadn't called either.

I calmly explained to her that Phil's flight could have been delayed or canceled. Everyone was probably calling home and no phone's were available for him to from. His cell phone could have been off or not charged too. I clicked send and got off the computer.

But still, could it be Victoria? I doubt she would know who Phil is, but my mom's scent is probably mixed with his. I don't even know if Victoria even knows my mom's scent too.

I could hear Charlie slowly coming up the stairs. Once I heard his snores, I sighed with relief. Edward would be here soon.

"Worried?" Said a velvety voice from behind me.

"Edward!" I breathed. "You scared me."

He came closer to me then gave me a quick kiss. We climbed into bed and I rested my head on his muscular chest.

"Edward?" I said.

"Yes, love?"

"I got an e-mail from Renee. Phil was supposed to be home from a baseball game a few days ago. He still hasn't come back. I'm worried." I said.

"Well," He said. "Wait a day or two and see if you get any replies back from her. If not, then we'll come up with a plan."

I kissed his cheek. "Thank you, Edward." I said, then drifted off into a dreamless sleep.


	2. Prankcalls

**A/N: You know, I think I have writer's block for just writing and author's note. I don't have much to say except for thanks to all my readers out there and please review.**

**So… let the reading begin!**

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"Bella, Love?" A sweet velvety voice said faintly.

"Mmm?" I said.

"It's time to get up."

"No it's not." I said, putting the covers back on me.

"You get to start the list today." He said, clearly trying to lure me out of bed.

"Fine. You win." I said. There was no way I was denying an opportunity to do bad without getting caught.

He smiled. "I always do."

"Do not!"

"Do too."

"Do not!"

"DO TOO!" I screamed.

He sighed. "Fine, love. You win."

"Ha. I win! I'm awesome and I know it." I exclaimed.

"You are, love. You'll always be the most awesome person in my book." Edward said.

"So you're writing a book now?" I said playfully.

"No, love. You didn't take that seriously did you?" He said.

I sighed. Will he ever learn sarcasm? "Edward." I breathed. "You need to learn how to use sarcasm."

"Bella, love, I'm over a century year old. They didn't use sarcasm back then."

"Edward, you _are _over a century old and you _should _know about sarcasm because I bet in a hundred years it will be worse. I don't want you to be the school weirdo that doesn't know how to use sarcasm."

"Fine then, it's a bet." He said, putting his hand out to shake mine.

"So basically," I said. "You're agreeing to me becoming a vampire?"

If it was possible, I thought I saw his face become even whiter. "Let's just not talk about this now." He said.

I didn't question him after that.

So, I got dressed and quickly ate my breakfast then we got into my old beat-up truck - which I absolutely loved - and we made our way back to the Cullen's house.

"Bella!" Alice screamed as I got out of my car. "I have everything ready. Today, we are going to do prank calls! It will be so much fun. I don't know who we should call but I think Jessica or Mike would do. Maybe even McDonald's…The boys will be out of the house so that's good. They won't hear what we're up to."

Today, I was actually glad that Alice was in a good mood. If Jasper or Rosalie ruined her mood, I would be atrocious. I was looking forward to this. Alice never came up with good ideas until now.

"Bella, love, I'm going hunting with Emmett and Jasper now. Bye. I love you." He said, then kissed me softly on the lips.

"I love you too." I said, still in a daze.

"Bella, Bella, Bella," Alice sighed. "You two lovebirds look so gooey. Sometimes I think I might puke. But I can't. But I would if I could."

Rose walked in then. "I think we have some prank calls to make, ladies." She said, waving a shiny silver flip-phone in her hand.

"Oh yeah!" Alice exclaimed.

"Watch me, Bella. Then you can try." Alice said. She took the phone out of Rose's hand then dialed some number.

It rang for a few seconds then someone picked up. "Hello? This is LandsEnd. Kerry speaking! How may I help you? " The person said.

Alice disguised her voice very well. Instead of sounding soprano, she made it sound low and also added a very complicated accent to it. "I am looking for some sparkly jeans." She said.

"Ma'am, I'm not sure if we have sparkly jeans here. Is there anything else I can get you?" Kerry, the LandsEnd attendant said.

"Yes," Said Alice. "I am looking for a skull bikini, a pair of daisy dukes, and a plaid crop top."

"Ma'am. Those are not in the catalogue. Why don't you try our website?" Kerry said.

"I have the catalogue in my hand and it has a picture of it right in between page 40 and 41." Alice said.

I was surprised at how well she kept her voice. It never wavered, never showing a sign of bursting with laughter.

"Ma'am," Kerry said. "That's a Hooter's advertisement."

Alice flipped the phone in a second then burst of laughing. I burst out laughing too and so did Rose.

"That was so funny!" I choked, my words not recognizable from my laughter.

"I know!" Alice said, trying to calm herself down. "Hooters!" Then she burst out laughing again. "You try."

"Okay." I said, then she handed me the phone. "Who should I call?"

"Best Buy." She said.

"Okay." I dialed the number quickly then listened.

It said some random things in English and Spanish and then I waited for an attendant to come on the line.

After a minute or two a person answered. "Hello, you are talking to Ron from Best Buy. How may I help you?"

"Hello." I said in my most serious voice. "I am looking for some florescent pink air conditioners."

"Pink air conditioners?" said Ron.

"No. FLORESCENT pink air conditioners." I said. It's seriously so hard not to laugh.

"Oh, um… We don't have any florescent pink air conditioners, but we do have some that light up." he said.

"You know what," I said, trying to sound annoyed. "Your not any help to me. I am leaving. Good day." Then I slammed the phone shut.

I burst out laughing. It's really, really, hard to try to sound serious while your asking for something completely random. Alice and Rosalie were laughing too.

"That was so funny!" Rose choked out.

"I know!" Alice agreed. We were still giggling for almost an hour after that.

Just then, my stomach growled.

"Food time for the human!" Alice called out. She was back two minutes later with a turkey sandwich.

I took a bite of it. "Alice this is really good." I said. "Thank you."

"Your welcome. Esme made it."

I finished chewing then laughed. "Thank you, Esme!" I said.

I heard a faint, "Your welcome!" in the background.

Alice crossed out prank calling on the list. "Well," she said. "That was fun."


End file.
